Wombat Wiffleball League

1994
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1994 - The End of the Island(er)
The Last Year Played on Long Island 

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Alan Lewis

Chapter 10 - The End of The Islander
Adapted Words of Sir Arthur Conan Doyle
 
   Our meal was a merry one. Lewis could talk exceedingly well when he chose, and that night he did choose. He appeared to be in a state of nervous exaltation. I have never known him so brilliant. He spoke on a quick succession of subjects - on miracle plays, on medieval pottery, on Stradivarius violins, on the Buddhism of Ceylon, and on the warships of the future - handling each as though he had made a special study of it. His bright humour marked the reaction from his black depression of the preceeding days. Steve Pomposello proved to be a sociable soul in his hours of relaxation and faced his dinner with the air of a bon vivant. For myself I elated at the thought that we were nearing the end of our task, and I caught something of Lewis' gaiety. None of us alluded during dinner to the cause which had brought us together as we watched a customer struggle to remove his change from the plastic slide emerging from the cash register. His number three meal waiting motionlessly on the Wendy's counter beside him. 
   When the cloth was cleared, Lewis glanced at his watch and filled up three glasses with Diet Pepsi.
   "One strike," said he, "to the success of our little expedition. And now it is high time we were off. Have you the proposal, Chris?" 
   "I have it written on my old notepad in my Dungeons & Dragons folder."
   "You had best take it, then. It is well to be prepared. I see that Bill's 1989 hatchback is in the drive. I ordered it for half-past six."
   It was a little past seven before we reached the food kiosk at the Bay Shore Mall and we found Dave Kirkup waiting for us. Lewis eyed him critically.
   "Is there anything you want to say before I talk to him?"
   "Remind him that we all agree on this."
   "Then let's be off."
   A small change in the wording was made to add all four names to the document. We stepped forward, and sat beside the bespectacled and tense Mr. Kirkup. Pomposello, Lewis and I sat to his left. We placed one man, Bill Menendez, at the other side of the kiosk, to watch the doors. Menendez had official mall security credentials that might come in hand should the situation demand it.
   "What's this?" asked Kirkup.
   "It's a proposal. A rule change. To tell you, and all others, that you can't block the strike zone with your body."
   Our plan was evidently a very good one. We shot glances toward each who were in our line of sight. Lewis smiled with satisfaction as we delivered the overhauled rule sheet, and left it and Dave, behind us.
   "We ought to still be able to get tickets for the 7:10 showing of Clear and Present Danger," he said.
   "Well, hardly. It's already 7:25." replied Pomposello with a quick nod towards his imitation Rolex.
   "We shall have to catch the 7:30 screeing of Forrest Gump then, and it has a reputation for being a winner. I will tell you how the land lies, Chris. You recollect how annoyed I was at my pitches being blocked at the plate?"
   "Yes."
   "Well, I gave my mind a thorough ... 

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This really and truly happened. I think. No wait ... I'm sorry. It was the whole revealing the scar on his rump to President Johnson - who absolutley LOVED looking at ass scars -  that really happened ... right? Um ... no? But when he taught Elvis how to dance, that must have been real! Because if I had huge metal braces on my legs, and my momma wore that silly ol' hat to my school, I know I'd be dancing that way too.

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Batter of the Year - Chris DiCesare didn't miss a beat returning from Florida in great physical shape after running on the sandy beaches for a year. He led the league with an impressive 87 homers - more than double the 42 hit by runner-up Steve Pomposello. DiCesare would lead the league in virtually every offensive category from RBI (264) to triples (7). During the season, Chris - nicknamed 'Bucky' by his friends for his penchant for running around in his birthday suit - was invited by a magazine publisher to do some figure modeling up in Vermont. The pay would help feed his kids, and Alan Lewis agreed to drive him, so he went. During the outdoor photo shoot he leaned against a tree and got some sap on his butt. After 6 days of scrubbing Chris finally got it off, but he was so sore that he failed to homer in his next game. It would be the only time in the regular season from 1988-2006 that Bucky would fail to go deep. Rookie Dave Kirkup caused quite a stir when he began blocking the plate this his body. In spite of a mid-season rule change, Kirkup drew more base on balls than any other player.
 
Pitcher of the Year - Alan Lewis (pictured above pitched his way to a league high 6 wins with 79 strikeouts, more than double that of his nearest rival. Alan's 2.54 IRA would be among the best of his career which would run from 1989 through the 2003 season. 'The Rhino' - as he was called by his buddies for taking down some small trees with a running charge - was only midway through a career that would rank him as one of the greatest pitchers in the league's history. Lewis was an excellent chess player in high school, and he parlayed his acute mental prowess into an effective pitching tool. In 1992 he chipped a piece of wood off of a shed with his fastball. For almost a dozen years (1989-1999) The Rhino ruled the mounds of the Wombat Wiffleball League. Rumors that he possessed an invisible dog snout have never been substantiated.
 
League Leaders:
Home Runs     Chris DiCesare (87)
RBI                   Chris DiCesare (264)
Average          -statistic not kept -
Wins                Alan Lewis (6)
KO's                Alan Lewis (79)
IRA                   Alan Lewis (2.54)
 

Click on Year to View History
 
1994      1995      1996      1997      1998      1999
2000      2001      2002      2003      2004      2005

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In Major League Baseball: No World Series (Player's Strike)
Top Song: I'll Make Love To You - Boyz II Men 

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Forrest Gump - starring Tom Hanks - was the top grossing film of 1994. 

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